


Growing Pains

by Almagester



Category: One Piece
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Comfort, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Growing Up, Reminiscing, small mentions of trafalgar fam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:20:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26868811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Almagester/pseuds/Almagester
Summary: In which Law ruminates on a melancholy date again.
Relationships: Donquixote "Corazon" Rosinante & Trafalgar D. Water Law, Heart Pirates & Trafalgar D. Water Law, Mugiwara Kaizoku | Strawhat Pirates & Trafalgar D. Water Law
Comments: 2
Kudos: 32





	Growing Pains

**Author's Note:**

> Hey folks! School has been kicking my ass for the past year so my motivation to write anything outside academics took a big hit, but I'm gonna see how I do getting myself back into the game. I feel super rusty but I had to make something for today and this is a fic I actually had a lot of fun with! So here's to a great birthday for our lovely little lad :)

The first thing Law felt when he was “freed” back on Minion Island was nothing more than the dull ache of White Lead Syndrome, perhaps an even deeper hurt that he, to this day, didn’t want to address.

Tottering up the snowy hill, away from the treasure in which he was hidden, and painfully unaware of Cora-san’s location, Law’s thoughts of escape were only secondary. The lump in his throat wouldn’t die away despite how much his vocal chords worked at each wail. But throughout that, he had been reassured when he couldn’t make a single sound. There was no soft crunch of snow underfoot, no rustle of the old blanket Cora-san nestled him with, no satisfying reverberance of Law’s cries. To Law, all that at least meant his benefactor was still alive, somewhere on this lonely island.

Distantly hearing his hoarse voice droning back into existence, Law made futile attempts to smother it, choke it down, as if that alone would keep Cora-san alive. He knew better.

He didn’t care if unsavoury company would find him. Eventually, everything around Law became an echo of his grief, the empty environment seeming to mock him with each sob thrown back at him. Each snowflake felt so significant against the warmth of the tear tracks on his cheeks. He finally collapsed from fatigue in some remote place.

Law spent another birthday terribly alone again. From what he could recall, he spent around two of them in the company of the Donquixote Pirates, not that it felt so important a fact to have shared with them. The one following Cora-san’s death hurt a bit more though, somehow; so he spent it working himself sick trying to conjure the devil fruit he felt so undeserving of.

_ Room. _

His bony fingers, dusted pink from the sharp air, curled stiffly as a circle of dust bloomed at his fingertips. A pathetic ball of light flickered and struggled to grow.

“Come on, do something, dammit…” Law wondered all too frequently how bad it could possibly be to just finally let himself go that day.

But each time, there was a flood of guilt as he kept seeing Cora-san’s smile. And so he kept trying.

Sucking in a deep, bone-rattling breath, Law sustained the bubble at his hand and held onto the image of Cora-san. Sweat beaded at his temple and he bit his lip to distract from the overloaded ache that came with the memories.

_ I love you! _

That silly smile finally pushed the tiny room to balloon, so sudden Law almost lost it in his surprise. Sitting still for a moment, Law’s eyes became glassy as he realized the familiarity of the humming blue dome, like he was settled under the Calm Calm fruit again.

_ No, no distraction. This is urgent. _

Wiping his eyes, Law finally grabbed the modest dagger he had stolen a few days prior. The distractions seemed to grow even further with the weight of it in his trembling left hand.

_ Fuck. Am I gonna do this without anaesthetic? _

He probably would’ve heaved a laugh, maybe even a sob, thinking about how his parents would’ve chastised him for the language, but there’s no energy to spare. Everything weighed on that childish blade.

Gulping down a few more breaths, Law plunged the dagger into his chest without thinking, instinctively digging into where everything hurt most.

To his pleasant surprise, the pain never came, or intensified, rather. Through hazy eyes, Law watched his hands carve a shaky, rough-edged square into himself. Feeling out the aches, Law eagerly pulled his heart out of himself, excited to be rid of it for a moment, trying to keep a brave face as he held it in his hand.

His technique left much to be desired, but Law was mostly disappointed when the ache only persisted in his chest cavity. He sighed and swiftly went to work, beginning to remove the white lead from his system. All he could manage by the end of that day was his heart; he allowed himself simple, pitiful humour, imagining that Cora-san, by extension to this meager operation, wouldn’t be hurting anymore. As he settled in for a restless sleep, Law elected to ignore the lingering pangs that no scalpel, however fine, could carve out.

The ocean was calm as they sailed. Law seated himself on one of Sunny’s railings, risking a fall into the waters for better exposure to the cool sea breeze. However rowdy they were, the Strawhats knew well enough to give him the occasional moment to reconcile with any leftovers in him long after the defeat of Doflamingo. He would sooner die before he told them he appreciated it. But he did appreciate all of it.

Regardless of how everything played out, how  _ messy _ it had been, the wrath Law carried since his early adolescence was nowhere to be found. Still unused to the lightness in his shoulders, Law almost felt like the breeze would carry him off.

Knowingly foolish, all variables considered, Law slumped against the wall to take a nap, still near teetering atop the railing. He was content to be swept away by the waves of the merciless ocean or the whims of the insufferable Strawhats.

Around sixteen, Law found himself under an actual roof for the first time in a while. There was a certain tension in the air, though the peace was kept.

Two other boys were shifting in the background as Law tended to a white bear’s wounds, fingers the steadiest they’ve ever been.

He had recently gotten rid of the last trace of white lead, having quickly picked up an array of useful skills from his fruit along the way. Law remembered the relief when he managed to harness the scan ability, when it confirmed he was finally free from one demon in his life. To his slight dismay, the white patches remained steadfast for a few years after, playing the long game in fading away.

In contrast to first impressions, Shachi and Penguin followed him like little ducklings, though Law didn’t think he was any older than them. He almost couldn’t believe they had the tenacity to bully a polar bear earlier. Though they made their amends with Bepo soon after.

Law was grateful for the simple time spent on Swallow Island with those three. The days generally passed with ease. All they had known was training, growing crops, and sleeping dead through the nights. While the nightmares flared up at news of a certain Dressrosan coronation, the fear wasn’t so prolonged when he woke up with the others nearby.

The first night, Law absentmindedly crawled towards Bepo, and upon discovery of how soft the Mink was, he stayed glued to him for the rest of the night. In the morning, he would only pry himself off reluctantly to feign his usual indifference. Law wasn’t ready to get into details of his night terrors yet.

However, what the other three did manage to pry out of Law was his birthday when he had been ready to relinquish it to the ordinary; a haunted day that, in a sense, spawned all the struggling.

But for his seventeenth, Law was finally granted an easygoing day. Just like any other, topped with warm chocolate-chip muffins shared with company at the end of the night.

“Torao!”

It was as Law expected: he had slipped off the railing and into the ocean.

Now ensconced in the deceptively cold waters, Law found he didn’t actually want to die that much in their hold. Not that he had any say in it, though.

_ What a thing to wake up to. _

The cold water seeped into his clothes and dug its nails into his frame, reminding him, unnecessarily, of everything he’d been meditating on. Time dragged under the deafening presence of water.

Still, Law thought, if he were to die, perhaps Cora-san would arrive to escort him. Or even his first family, if they recognized him? That wouldn’t be so bad.

With the stunting effects of white lead gone, the soreness characteristic of growth replaced the sickness in Law’s bones. These pangs seemed so urgent, though, as if making up for lost time. As opposed to the heavy weight that stayed frequenting his chest, constricting slowly like there was all the time in the world.

Law grew stupidly fast in the span of a few months. His limbs stretched without sparing any time to stock up on more than just skin and bone, leaving him feeling oddly skeletal. He earned many bruises from miscalculations (and forgetfulness) on how far out his legs reached compared to before.

And it was all preferable to the illness from before.

Slowly coming to, Law squinted at the brightness around him, bracing himself for the unexpected. But once adjusted, he only found himself in the infirmary. Surrounded by a good portion of the Strawhats.

Nami started off the admonishments. “You dumbass! I thought you of all people would know better than to tempt death like that!”

Law realized Chopper was sitting on him when the reindeer sobbed, “We’re never letting you near the railings again!”

“Easy, easy, I’m not a child.” Law aimlessly pet Chopper’s head as the tiny doctor stifled his sniffles.

Luffy peered at him studiously, possibly checking for sustained damage. When Law’s state was deemed passable, the laughter came easily to the Strawhat captain.

“Looks like we’re gonna have to babysit you for a bit, huh?”

“Shut up.”

To reassure Chopper, Law promised to stay resting in the infirmary, and he wasn’t one to break a promise as simple as that. Without the steady breeze, Law didn’t feel so inclined to think about the past as he directed his gaze towards the sun letting itself in through the window.

There was a firm knock on the door frame.

“Everything good, Law?” Sanji, magically balancing a plate on his head, was at the door.

“Fine. Don’t worry about me.”

Sanji let himself in to set a platter of onigiri on Law’s lap. “Keep your energy up, almost drowning isn’t fun. It’s lucky that Mosshead was awake when you went down.”

Law snorted at that, but accepted the food with a bow of his head.

“Give him my thanks.”

“Sure, once he wakes up again.” One hand now freed, Sanji held his cigarette and let out a long exhale. “Anything else you need before I pop out?”

Law shook his head. Sanji seemed awfully busy, and the chef did enough with offering food.

Left alone again, Law quietly focused on breathing deeply, tracing the shapes of the individual rice grains of the onigiri with his eyes. Strawhats’ classic chatter streamed in from outside.

Gingerly sinking his teeth into a rice ball, Law realized there were tears running down his cheeks. From what, he didn’t exactly know. But in a matter of seconds, the aching in his chest came back, hurting more than ever.

The food tasted so good. Law strangely felt like there was a final goodbye happening somewhere within him. Whatever it was, he didn’t really want to let go; what else would be left of him if everything he carried all these years vanished today? Law didn’t want to dwell on how afraid that made him.

_ Don’t try to find a reason for someone else’s love. _

It wasn’t his birthday yet, far from it, but Law felt this moment of surviving was celebratory enough to fall asleep thinking about the well-rested, smiling faces of his family and Cora-san.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Hope that was an enjoyable read despite whatever issues may be prevalent in it! I still have some ideas percolating for the other fics I have going right now, but no guarantees for getting back into those soon. Nonetheless, I hope to see y'all around!


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